(Er, Monster of the Month, due to sickness and the whole Christmas thing)

Golems are a classic part of D&D. Everyone knows the deal: you find a statue with massive eye gems, you pry the gems out, and the statue wakes up and kills you. Or somesuch. There’s more to them, of course, and that’s what I’m here to discuss.

For those living under rocks, Golems are animated constructed creatures, made from flesh (Frankenstein’s monster), stone, clay, iron, or snazzier stuff like mithril and adamantine. They are commonly created by Wizards who either have nothing better to do, or need a guard or something.

So, how to use them?

3.5 Edition D&D:

Don’t.

Just. Don’t.

What? Why would I even write this if I’m telling you not to use them? Well, so that I can tell you not to use them! Read on.

You should not use Golems because they make the game unfun. A Golem’s massive pile of immunities and high DR/Adamantine makes the following classes go sit in the corner and play cards:

*Rogues: should not be punished because they’re the best balanced class in 3.5 D&D

*Rangers: should not be punished because they suck

*Evocation Wizards and Sorcerers: should not be punished because they suck

Any decent party will simply have the casters cast a couple of buffs (Bull’s Strength, for example), and then everyone that’s not the Fighter/Barbarian/Druid/Heavy Melee will go and join the Rogues and Rangers playing cards. The Wizard can cast Grease for a nigh-instant win, or, say, Wall of Stone + Acid Fog if we’re dealing with the Greater Stone Golem or another which actually has a decent Reflex save. Again, we’re back to everyone having a tea party while the fighters hack apart the Golem or the Acid Fog dissolves them. It’s just boring for all involved, and D&D, being a game, is meant to be fun. You should never put in an encounter where some players simply can’t do anything. I’ve done it and regretted it.

If, for some strange reason, you still want to put a Golem into your 3.5 game, use the 4E comments below. Just pick whichever golem either fits best with your situation, or is the right CR. The Flesh Golem might be okay to use anyway, since the DR is only 5, meaning Rogues and Rangers can at least do a few points of damage.

4th Edition D&D:

Ah, now we’re getting somewhere. Whilst the Monster Manual has a depressingly low number of Golems (Flesh + Stone, that’s it!), they’re worth using now because 4E has removed the massive pile of immunities they’ve got. Now all classes can be effective in a fight against Golems, thus making the combat enjoyable, thus making it acceptable.

From a mechanical perspective, start by choosing which Golem (*sigh* of the TWO) that is level-appropriate. But don’t stop there: a Golem by itself is not that great, and remember: 4E is all about encounter groups. Now, for some reason the Monster Manual recommends a Lamia: no idea why. Suffice to say, any Controller works great with a Golem: the Controller impedes the foe, and the Golem applies excessive force.

Glancing through the Monster Manual, a few creatures stand out to me as being useful with a Golem. Note that thematically, the intelligent ones are best: they play as the Golem masters.

*A few Eladrin Twilight Incanters (Level 8): They can Immobilize, Teleport, and Blind enemies! Thematically good, as Golem masters.
*Gibbering Mouther (level 10) or Gibbering Abomination (level 18): They can Daze everyone lots, very nice.
*Grell Philosopher (Level 11 Elite): Dazing, Blinding… all good.
*Kuo-toa Whip (level 16): Blinding, Prone, and can hold people and slide them around.
*The recommended Lamia actually has lousy synergy, and I see no reason why a Lamia would be fighting with a Golem, especially a Flesh Golem.
*Lich (level 14): Not too bad. Good synergy with Necrotic Aura, and thematically appropriate.
*Medusa Archer (level 10): Ooh, that looks like fun. Poison and potential Petrification will certainly distract the players… a Stone Golem could be an animated petrified fellow…
*Mind Flayer Mastermind (level 18 Elite): Heh. Dazing, Immobilizing, Dominating… oh, and brain eating. Great synergy, and thematically fine.
*Mummy Lord (level 13 Elite): Not too bad: Fear and Disease help the cause. Thematically good: the Golem is guarding the Mummy’s tomb.
*Bone Naga (level 16 Elite): Wow. Immense amounts of Dazing, and some Weakening too! A Naga is often a guard, like a Golem, so they fit together fine.
*Rakshasa Noble (level 19): Blinding, Dazing, Stunning… and they’re smart enough to build a Golem.

You may question why I selected many creatures which cause Dazing, since the Golems’ own attacks cause it. However, Dazing really synergises well with Golem Rampage: the Rampage is most effective when enemies are grouped, and can’t make Opportunity Attacks. Daze restricts maneuverability and removes the Opportunity Attacks.

Now, the actual implementation will largely depend on the accompanying creatures: the Golem just tags along. Having an awaking statue is always fun, however it doesn’t lend itself well to having an encounter group. No matter how tempting it is to throw a solo Golem at people, I highly recommend you don’t. Like many big, stupid creatures, they are highly susceptable to being wiped by a smart party.

Killing a Golem:

In 4E, I honestly think the Flesh Golem (level 12) is more dangerous than the Stone Golem (level 17) for an unprepared party. Why? Because as soon as it hits Bloodied, it gets free attacks every time you hit it. You should try to shut down this defence: Daze will work, as will knocking it Prone, Stunning it, or knocking it Unconcious. Other than that, I would recommend having everyone spread out, to minimize the effectiveness of the Golem Rampage. If you can Immobilize it, close in and have everyone in reach: Golem Rampage will not be danger since it can’t move, and it will distribute its attacks amongst the party. Remember that at the end of the day, any Healing Surge in the entire party not used is a Healing Surge wasted. Take a hit for the Fighter sometimes.

If you’re playing 3.5 and you can’t work out how to kill a Golem, you either (a) have a Wizard, and have thus won D&D, so cast Grease and be done with it, or (b) can just get all the casters to buff the biggest melee fighter and wait it out. If, for some reason, you have no casters, just try to Power Attack the thing to death, although the DR, big damage, and lots of HP may cause you serious trouble.

In summary: Golems really only worth using in 4E, where they are a perfect example of how 4E monsters work best with other creatures of different roles to aid them.

Make wise monster choices, and you will improve not only the quality of the game, but the enjoyment of it for both DM and players alike.

Wands in 4E are often given the bad reputation of being the worst implement. At first glance, the magic Wands are inferior to other implements, and the Wizard’s Implement Mastery ability for Wands seems inferior to that for Staves and Orbs. In this article, I will address the Wizard’s Implement Mastery use of Wands, and also the use of magic Wands: not just for Wizards and Warlocks, but for all classes.

Firstly, the Wizard. If you’re in touch with the D&D forums, you’ll know that the internet is in love with the Orb. True, the Orb is almost definately mechanically superior at high levels, but the choice of implement radically affects the style of your character. I am currently playing a quite successful Eladrin Wand Wizard, and I urge anyone to choose their Implement based on how they want their character to actually play. There are many good ways of playing a Wizard.

The first thing to realise about the Wand of Accuracy class feature is it is reactive. You can decide to add your Dex bonus to your roll even after the DM has already said that you miss. This is vitally important, and makes the Wand able to compete with not just the other Wizard Implement Mastery options, but with other classes’ class features. If your DM disagrees, pick up the PHB and whack him with it.

NB: WotC CustServ said no. They’re wrong. Extrapolation at bottom of post.

Secondly, you have to know when to use your Wand. Ideally, ask yourself at the beginning of each combat: what is the best power I’m going to use? Daily powers are usually more important than Encounters, and higher level powers are usually more important than lesser ones. Make sure you have the Wand use available when you use that best power. If it turns out you didn’t need it, no worries: use it on the next important power you use. Just make sure you are never left going:  “I wish I still had my Wand use, I really needed that Sleep to hit the guy”.

So, now on to the use of magic Wands. Firstly, the actual Wands to use.

For general purposes, the Wands in the PHB are terrible. Especially early on (level 7 and earlier) you probably just want a basic Magic Wand. If you have the Adventurer’s Vault book, then options improve: there’s actually some half-decent Wands. They are generally still inferior to the great Staff powers or the OMGYOUBROKED&D Orb powers, but they’re Wands that are actually worth having. The Assured Wands are lame, but the element-specific wands give a nice boost to damage if you are focussed on a single element, and the Master’s Wands give a good boost to your At-Will: handy, since At-Wills are used so much.

But wait, there’s more. Obscure rules allow the PHB wands to be actually worth taking.

Consult PHB page 242. You can create a wand with ANY encounter power. Scrap the entire premade wand list that’s level 13+: you can make these wands with better spells in them. Particularly useful at higher levels: don’t grab a Wand of Icy Rays +4, grab a Wand of Mesmeric Hold or Prismatic Burst +4, for the same price and level!

You can also put Encounter Utility powers in. Whilst the Encounter limitation unfortunately rules out many good Wizard spells, there are some very good Warlock Utility powers. A Wand must contain a power from a class that can use a Wand as an Implement, so at the moment that’s just Wizards and Warlocks. The Artificer and Bard previews indicate Wands as Implements, so check their Powers, particularly when the classes are released.

To use a Wand, all you need is any one power from the same Power Source. Wow. So, Wizards, Warlocks, and Swordmages (Forgotten Realms Player’s Guide) can automatically use all Arcane Wands (the only current type), and future classes such as Bards and Artificers will be able to too. So, your Wizard or Swordmage can whip out a want containing one of the sweet Warlock utilities, or a Swordmage can whip out a Wizard spell. Fun!

As an aside, as you grow in power and wealth, having level 8 wands holding level 2 Warlock utilities becomes increasingly economically feasible. You can buy 5 for the price of 1 level 13 item.

But wait. There’s more. Remember the requirement? Any Power of the same Power Source. So, you can take a Multiclass Power Swap feat (grab Shield, for example). Or: Be a Half-Elf, and take your Dilettante Power as an Arcane one. Since Half-Elves get +2 Con and Cha, the Warlock ones are probably best. Oh, look, you can now use all Arcane Wands.

Now, using the Wand ability is a Daily Item Power (1/day/character/tier), it’s a little limited, but you get extra Item uses at Milestones, and at Paragon you’ve got 2/day base. So, as soon as you hit Paragon levels, go to the discount bin and buy a few wands. All three Warlock level 2 Encounter Utilities are good, as are both Wizard ones. The Feat Quick Draw may come in handy if to draw the Wands in a hurry, and may (DM permitting) allow you to Quick Draw a Shield Wand on demand; otherwise you may need a free hand: not a problem for some classes, such as Rogues.

The use of Wand powers can particularly help if you’re trying to make a Fighter/Mage type character, which is a bit tricky in 4E.

Well, that’s about it. I hope you can see that Wands are worth having: try to make the most out of them!

Incidentally, if you’re interested taking general utility items to a whole new level, above and beyond just having a few Wands, this forum post: Guide to the Utility Belt Wizard is an interesting view on, well, just that.

Footnote: WotC Customer Service response to Wand of Accuracy class feature

NEW NEWS: PHB FAQ says yes! Number 26. Thank you to everyone who has been commenting on and discussing this post.

As some of you may know, the CustServ said that the Wand usage must be declared before the attack. This is rubbish. Firstly, remember that the Customer Service folk are NOT the developers, and they’ve got things wrong before. Secondly:

1. It’s phrased the same as Orb. They both say “once per encounter as a free action”, and no-one disagrees that you can use the Orb after you see if you hit.

2. Every other class feature is reactive. Striker extra damage dice, for example, and both other Wizard implements. There is no reason why the Wand should mysteriously be so incredibly weak. Even with being reactive, the Wand is considered to be definitely weaker than the Orb, and only sporadically better than the Staff. If you have to declare it first, it’s definitely weaker than the Staff.

If you’re a player, explain this to your DM. If you’re a DM… honestly, the Wand ability is a lot less cheesy than Orb, and none of the magic Wands have any of the OMGBBQMAO abilities of some of the Staves and Orbs. If you don’t let the players use Wands reactively, you’ve got your priorities wrong.

Zombie Attack! for the iPhone has kept me happily distracted protecting the beer shack vigorously against the zombie onslaught for more hours than I care to admit. The recent update has seen the game improved immensely with new ways of controlling the dude, cheaper building, a “secret” weapon in the beer shack and the dude and shack healing themselves.

With the upgrade of the game I have started getting to level 30 pretty frequently, and I assuming that that is not too bad seeing as a lot of my friends who play the game struggle to get to level 15. Being eager to help my fellow man during the zombie apocalypse (not a guarantee…) I am posting Rupert’s Guide to Killing Zombies for Zombie Attack!.

Step One – Hurt Zombies are Easier to Pick Off (or, Why the Cannons Don’t Suck)

Hurt zombies in Zombie Attack! suffer huge penalties. For lost limbs, they lose attack strength, for lost legs they start to wander in circles (taking longer to get to the shack) and if they lost their heads they wander aimlessly only attacking if they get to a target by accident.

Using this strategy we do two things. Firstly, use the Cannon to hit the groups of zombies as they arrive through the gate. The area of effect weapon is a good way of hitting lots of zombies with one hit. Flank the cannon with swinging axes as this will definitely remove a limb or two (see above).

If your cannons and axes are doing the job properly, then your zombies will be ready for step two.

Step Two – The Beer Shack Must Be Protected

Once you have your cannons and axes chopping up zombies, its time to clean them up. The Guns are not particularly good at taking out a healthy zombie before it gets to your shack, but they are very good at polishing them off if they are hurt badly.

I place one gun at the corner of the shack first so that it can hit the three areas you need to concentrate on – the direct line to your shack and the right and left flank. Build this gun up to its maximum and be prepared to man it bravely (see Step Three below). Follow this one up with a gun on each flank to protect the sides of the shack and to proved some crossfire (see Step Four below).

Step Three – Be Prepared To Die

One of the new additions to the game is that you get a 20% bonus to any gun that you man. This is extremely useful if you start to get swamped or just haven’t got the money to upgrade yet.

Zombies will also sort of chase your dude for a little while as well which can be very useful in distracting them from breaking into your beer shack.

If you are like me, the death of the dude is not important – he comes back and its not about points, its about killing zombies. Its not unusual for me to go through 3-4 dudes…

Step Four – Crossing Arcs of Fire

After the initial set up of your defences is complete, its time to make sure that your zombies are getting hit by at least 2 weapons at any given time. This is best done by making sure that your weapons at the back of the line are upgraded first so that they can reach the zombies at the front, and also adding new weapons around the central line as soon as is feasible.

If you aren’t playing the game, you probably should be, its not expensive and lots and lots of fun.

Zombie Attack! (iTunes link) USD 0.99 | AUD 1.19

If anyone is getting much past level 30 50, can you let me know how in the comments please?

Update: I am getting past level 45 almost every game now. I am posting the set up that I am using in the hopes that it will aid my fellow zombie hunters…

The regular 4E D&D sheet is too limited for use without other accessories.

Some time ago, I wrote about the choosing of the best D&D 4E character sheet. That was when I was creating my very first 4E character: now that I’ve actually played the game, and have had some experience, I decided to revisit the subject.

As I’ve gained experience with the game, I’ve learnt an important lesson: even if you can remember your powers (I can), you are going to get items which have lots of details, and a single line entry on the character sheet just doesn’t cut it. Ideally, you need plenty of room. Then means that, unless you’re using other cards and the like, the standard D&D 4E character sheet simply doesn’t work. It also has very small (and poor) sections for writing mundane equipment.

I have been using this sheet and, frankly, I’m disappointed. I suppose during playtesting they were drunk or something, because there’s no way you can fit all the required information onto the sheet. I mean, honestly, the AC doesn’t separate armour and ability bonus: annoying for anyone using light armour, such as my Wizard.

Update: Previously, I had recommended Ema’s Charsheets as neat new-player-friendly dynamic sheets. However, Wizards of the Coast recently asked for the site to be taken down, possibly because the dynamic sheets put in a bit more rules information than they liked, so these sheets are unfortunately no longer available.

Shado's sheets are beautiful, and fit everything quite nicely.

Alternatively, there’s Shado’s Character Sheets, shown left. They’re gorgeous landscape sheets, and sport plenty of room for absolutely everything, including an acceptable amount of space for equipment. The power sheet is very well designed, and means you don’t have to worry about power cards if that’s not your thing. The sheer prettiness of them is fantastic.

Shado’s Character sheets definately get the award for the prettiest ones: they’re what the official 4E sheets should have looked like. They use the same style and colours that the rulebooks use, which helps in quickly identifying various elements.

Download Shado’s Character Sheets.

However, whichever you choose, the amounts of text associated with the powers and items, you may have to resort to using cards. Specially made Power Cards are quite popular. After a bit of searching, I must agree with Google: the best power cards I can find are Ander00’s, found here. You should check that link for the current version, or may download the complete set as a pdf here, although it may not be up to date. There are also cards that can be used for items, and other such things.

Of course, if you don’t want to fuss around proper Power Cards, there’s the ultimate D&D player’s tool: The index card. Buy a pack of them at the newsagent, and they’ll serve you well.

A few days ago the developers of iPhone polyhedral dice rolling application ‘Pip’ (Mystery Coconut) sent me a request to look at their application and offer my thoughts. Well, we have had a play around with it and we have to say that we are quite enamoured with this new entry into the Dice Roller club. Their design philosophy is quite different from other iPhone Dice Rollers like Diceonomicon and MachDice – instead of trying to cram everything into one application, they have concentrated on keeping the whole thing simple.

What you won’t get is a log of dice rolls or a formula editor, a stack of different backgrounds or dice colours. Instead, they have concentrated on making a very realistic physics engine (comparable to MotionX) and beautiful graphics. The result is quite refreshing – it is really really really simple to use.

If you are not playing games using the FUDGE system of White Wolf system, this is probably the best dice roller for you. We found having to type in formulas to be a bit of distraction in the end, it proved much simpler to just roll the damn dice and not worry about it. Pip allows you to just add the dice you need and roll them – all you need in the majority of your games.

A few things we’d like to see in future versions include a way to re-roll the dice that doesn’t require us to shake the iPhone, and perhaps a selection of different dice skins. Overall though, a very polished app, and we feel, well worth the cost of purchase.

Features:

• Full set of dice (d4, d6, d8, d10, d10 (alt colour), d12, d20)
• Multiple pages – save pre-set rolls
• Hold dice to prevent re-rolling
• Highly polished physics engine

Pip USD 2.99 | AUD 3.99 (iTunes Link)

One game has been sadly missing from iPhones – a Rogue style game. Well, better than getting ‘a’ Rogue style game, Gandreas Games (the same people who brought us the awesome RPG dice roller Dicenomicon…) have released ‘the’ Rogue game for the iPhone. Those of you who have played Moria (a game we are VERY fond of around here…) will immediately recognise the game (Moria was heavily influenced by Rogue). Each game is randomly generated with each dungeon level different from the last.

The iPhone port of the game is really well done. There are two views – in landscape you see the traditional ASCII generated levels, in portrait view you get a zoomed in look with graphics.

The developers have also been really clever with the commands, building in custom swipes for each command making control of the game quite simple (once you familiarise yourself with the commands…). They have also included the help manual in the game as well, preventing the need to open a browser or exit the game.

Feature list from the developer’s website:

• Playable in either “ASCII” mode, or graphics mode (just rotate the device to switch)
• Obscure keyboard commands replaced with a simple taps for movement, or a handy command picker.
• Commands can also be activated by a unique gesture based command – want to search for a secret door? Swipe across the top of the play area (all the gestures are shown on the command picker for easy reference)
• Graphics can be zoomed in/out via pinch
• Completely faithful Rogue experience (all the levels, monsters, potions, scrolls, etc…)

The game is free in the App Store (iTunes link).

Unlike the previous two Monsters of the Week, this week I look at a monster which is completely unintelligent, has no tactics, and is a pushover for any party: and yet can be the most dangerous thing they ever face.

The Gelatinous Cube has been in D&D since 1st Edition, and is a classic example of a dungeon monster: it conveniently fits into all the corridors, and might pick up loot which you can extract upon killing it. Very nice. Unlike a lot of other 1st Edition monsters, it’s not uber-cruel (Green Slime, Rust Monster…), which means it’s still useful.

By the way, if you’re trying to find it in the 3.5 or 4E Monster Manual, it’s under Ooze.

The way of using the Gelatinous Cube is not to just put it in a corridor. That’s silly. Unless the party’s Spot/Perception is so low they walk into it (heh) they can just outrun it and use ranged weapons. Big non-issue, easy XP. The way of using the Gelatinous Cube is to have some other creatures get clever with it.

The best way is to use the Gelatinous Cube as a trap. Either drop it on the party, or drop the party on it.

Drop party on it: Easy. Goblins build pit trap, Gelatinous Cube falls in. Goblins go “huh.”, and feed it stuff to keep it alive. Party falls in. Yay! For 3.5E: 20ft deep camouflaged Pit Trap (DMG p71): CR 2 Gelatinous Cube (MM p201-p202): CR 3 Look on players’ faces: Priceless For 4E: Elite False-Floor Pit (DMG p87): 200 XP Gelatinous Cube (MM p202): 400 XP Laughing maniacally in the corner: Priceless Note that there is some erratta for the 4E Gelatinous Cube: the Slam damage is increased by 1d6, and the Engulf should have a Melee Attack symbol.

Drop it on party: Mainly useful to mix it up a bit, if the players are too aware of pit traps. Heh. Sploosh! Also friendlier, because if they can get out of the Gelatinous Cube they’re not still 10 ft below floor level. Use this if you don’t want to risk killing anyone, at the loss of a bit of realism: honestly, how many goblins winch Gelatinous Cubes up and drop them on people? For this method, just use the Gelatinous Cube, with no trap. If the Gelatinous Cube falls on someone, they get automatically engulfed, and then I’d say it gets a surprise round, assuming the party isn’t immune to being surprised for some reason. See page references and the like above. Whichever way you use, you should reward the players the full XP if they evade the Gelatinous Cube entirely: it’s basically like a trap, and you get XP for evading traps. This will also encourage sensible play.

Suffice to say, next time you want to mix things up with a tricky trap, consider the Gelatinous Cube as a healthy addition to your game. With a bit of clever thinking, I’m sure there’s even more ways you can use it. Just remember: don’t waste a Gelatinous Cube on a direct encounter.

Stay tuned next week for another great Monster of the Week!

Nerds love Monty Python, right? I mean, there’s even a programming language named after the group… Well, in another case of “there’s nothing new under the sun” it seems that Monty Python’s “Dead Parrot Sketch” is perhaps a little bit older than previously thought. A scholar of Ancient Greece by the name of William Berg has translated a joke book written in the 4th Century CE containing 265 jokes by the comedians Hierocles and Philagrius. This comedy pair compiled a list of jokes called “Philogelos: The Laugh Addict”.

In Monty Pythons sketch, a man attempts to return a dead Norwegian Blue Parrot to a particularly difficult shopkeep. In the ancient Greek version, it’s a dead slave. Obviously, times have changed, but the joke is surprisingly similar. Other jokes, it seems, have also withstood the test of time, appearing in modernised versions around the world also.

From the Telegraph’s article:

Jokes about wives, it seems, have always been fair game.

One joke goes: “A man tells a well-known wit: ‘I had your wife, without paying a penny’. The husband replies: “It’s my duty as a husband to couple with such a monstrosity. What made you do it?”

Brilliant… who would have thought that the roots of British humour were so old?

You can see Monty Python’s sketch on Youtube here:

The original joke can be found here in electronic book format.

This week we look at the Dark Elves, known as Drow in D&D. Like many of the creatures, Dark Elves have their history in mythology. Norse mythology places Dark Elves as evil underground creatures, which is exactly what Drow generally are in D&D.

The Drow have had a hard time getting into our general knowledge. The First Edition Monster Manual has but four lines on them, under Elf. Slowly, however, the players grew curious about these creatures. The 1E Fiend Folio has them as monsters, the Dungeoneer’s Survival Guide had something on their culture.

Image by Olderkat, used under CC BY-NC-ND licence.

The lore on the Dark Elves expanded. From starting as simply evil underground Elves, they became a powerful force of evil. The Underdark, a warren of underground cave systems, became their home and battleground, fighting with fearsome creatures and carving out an empire. Many stories have been written of the home of the Drow, their lust for power at any cost. Writers gave Drow an assortment of powers, both for literary effect and to provide a challenge for players.

The power and awesomeness of Dark Elves led players to desire them as a playable race. The first published rules were in the 1E Unearthed Arcana; the rules were mainly concerned with restricting all the ridiculous abilities that the Drow as foes had. Amusingly, 1E UA comments: “A dark elf player character is considered an outcast from his or her homeland”, which led to most PCs being Chaotic Good outcasts struggling against their evil brethren. Statistically, they’d probably be struggling against the horde of other Chaotic Good outcasts.

Anyway, this is all well and good, but why include them in a game? Too overused, too cliche, you might say. Never! There’s a reason that the Dark Elves have become cliche: they’re perfect for D&D.

Drow are, to an extent, the ultimate enemies in D&D. They’re intelligent, they’re well equipped, they’re tactical… they’re almost… PCs! When a D&D party goes up against Drow, it’s like fighting another adventuring party, but the drow are cooler, better, faster, stronger, are better equipped, are magic resistant, and have a pile of special abilities. Drow are not like Dragons: as a foe, Dragons mainly require a large application of brute strength to defeat. If the DM does it properly, Drow require thinking. They’ve got class levels.

Traditionally, fighting Dark Elves was something you’d only do at high levels, when the DM started pulling out the big guns, as such. 3E changed everything. With proper rules for monsters with class levels, Drow suddenly became easier to use, and deadlier. Suddenly, well-equipped, smart, tactical, magic resistant foes are available for any experience level. 4E’s simplicity unfortunately works against them, with only a handful of mid-level Drow in the MM, although there are rules for monsters with class levels in the DMG.

So, with all that, you want to put Drow into your campaign. How? Well, assuming we’re going for the traditional antagonistic approach, there’s a few features of the Drow that fit really well into a campaign.

Firstly, the simplest method: the Underdark is like a giant dungeon. Put some lame excuse in front of your the players, and they’ll gleefully leap into an area full of all the best (really dangerous) monsters in the MM. There’s a lot of source material on Underdark societies, and there’s always opportunities for random encounters.

But what if you don’t want them traipsing into the Underdark? This is particularly problematic if your campaign setting doesn’t have an Underdark (mine doesn’t). Well, no worries, because Dark Elves are raiders. Drow are known to have quite a large number of slaves, and they also happen to like random violence. Bring them to the surface and have the Drow kill some people, and then the PCs can trace the killings and hunt down the Dark Elves.

Alternatively, you can expand the Drow into a more involved plotline. A popular one involves the drow invading the surface: they have the motive (desire for power, violence, and slaves), and they have the strategic skills to pull off a quite complicated war. Here’s a sample of a  part of a simple plot, which you could use as a springboard to incorporate a Drow invasion into your campaign:

The people of the city are called together. The duke speaks, and criers spread his words. Over the following hours, nearly the whole city have heard the news: the duke’s daughter has been kidnapped. Such an act has been immediately blame’s on the duke’s political enemies, but the cause is secondary to the panic. The duke calls for anyone with any information to report to him.

Remember: Game history has taught us never to let the goal of the quest be in the first place you look. It makes the game too short.

The player characters begin to investigate. Following the path of the kidnappers, they find the trail leads to an abandoned mansion outside the city. A small tribe of orcs seems to be occupying the house, but upon clearing it they find no trace of the duke’s daughter. However, by some method, be it a note from the Drow, a single drow leader, or another captive, the players find the orcs were either slaves or allies to Drow, who seek to use the duke’s daughter as a sacrifice to summon a great demon upon the city. In the demon’s chaos, the Drow will then attack and enslave or kill the whole population of the city.

Anyway, following this lead, the players can delve into the underdark and find the Drow task force. Then, by either force or stealth, they must rescue the duke’s daughter from an army of Dark Elves, and return to the city. As a final touch the the story, surviving Drow can try to summon the demon anyway, or launch a final desperate attack without it, creating a huge challenge for the players.

Always remember: use the Dark Elves’ intelligence, equipment, and special abilities to make every fight hard for the players. Drow don’t go down without a fight, and you shouldn’t let them. If you really do it right, the players will start to fear encounters with them. Creatures this awesome shouldn’t be pushovers.

Stay tuned for another monster next week!